"Why did you break the green plate?" Gabe suddenly demands in an accusing tone. For a moment I have no idea what he is talking about. Then I realize that he is talking about my green mixing bowl. I accidentally knocked one of my favorite bowls off of the counter last week. It shattered when it hit the floor. I really don't want to be reminded of this unfortunate event.Gabe begins to lecture me, but I cut him off quickly.
"That is enough. You will not mention the green bowl again." I say. It is not his job to lecture or discipline me. About a minute later he is ready for a second helping of the beans and chips that we are having for dinner. "Susan, please get me some more beans." Gabe asks in a somewhat demanding tone.
"In a minute," I say.
"I said now!" Gabe responds in a demanding tone.
"Excuse me. I have been working all afternoon while you have been playing." "SO," Gabe buts in. "So I am going to sit here and enjoy my food before I get up again."
"Do it now," he persists.
"I will get them in a minute," I respond. Gabe continues to whine about seconds every 10 -15 seconds.
This day has sure had it's ups and downs. It started out rough. Gabe began arguing and whining as soon as he got out of bed. He was upset and confused because we were going to the doctor - for me. I had an inflamed cyst removed from my back. Then we were dropping Angel off at the dentist and continuing a few blocks down the street for an intake appointment for counseling for Gabe. He repeatedly asked the same questions and said the same things. "I have no school? You going to the doctor for your back? You can't go to the doctor! I'm going to the doctor not you! I'm going with Dad on Wed and you can't go! I already did eat breakfast! (Not one bite yet) Why do I have to eat breakfast? You didn't give me my pill. Why do I have to take my pill?" All of these statements or arguments are said with a clearly defined whine or as demands and each was stated several times. While I'm trying to get him to come to the table and eat (we have to leave in a few minutes and all of the arguing has put us behind) he is putting on a pair of thin cloth shoes that Angel gave him. He has been told to put his boots on after breakfast, but he is determined to wear the shoes. "Angel said I could. She said I have to!" Angel has not said anything to him about the shoes.
"There is snow on the ground and you need to wear boots." I say. "Those cloth shoes will not keep your feet dry today. When they get wet, they will be cold."
"So!" is his response.
Finally we get out the door. As we pull in the parking lot of the doctor's office Gabe exclaims, "This is not the hospital!"
"It's my doctor," I explain.
"No it's not!" he argues. I ignore this statement as we get out of the van. At the doctor's office he is sweet and polite. He helps Angel carry Maree's bag. He also becomes very concerned for me. I have an infected cyst on my back. It was a sore on his mom DJ's back that put her in the hospital where she died. (The 'sore' was actually cancer that was all through her body. Gabe does not understand the difference between big and little hurts). I assure Gabe that I will be okay. The doctor is going to cut out the sore and it will hurt for a few more days and then it will be gone. As we leave the office Gabe needs to know if I got a shot. "Oh yes, about 4 or 5 of them," (numbing) I tell him. "But I'm just fine." Gabe is afraid of shots. I want him to know that people just get them and then go on. Everything is okay.
Next we dropped Angel off for her dentist appointment. As we pull away Gabe notices that Maree is still in the van. "She forgot the baby," he says in a panic.
"Remember, Maree is going with us," I remind him. "She can't go in to the dentist."
"Just give Angel her baby back now!" Gabe demands.
"She's with us," I say as I am driving. A few blocks from the dentist is Taco Bell. I quickly change the topic as it comes into view. "Would you like a snack. One thing from Taco Bell?" Breakfast was quick and light. Given the number of things we are going to do today, lunch will be late. At Taco Bell Gabe can have a crunchy taco with beans lettuce and rice. No gluten or dairy. He loves tacos.
At Gabe's counseling appointment he is once again very helpful with Maree. He carried her bag and even held her for a few moments a couple of times while I dug out paperwork. He can only hold her for a few minutes at a time. She wiggles to much and he starts to loose her. He does not have the co ordination or the thought process to figure out how to reposition her without dropping her. He wants to help, but he does not want her to cry. It is only a few blocks from Angel's dentist so we are expecting her to show up during the appointment. When Angel shows up to get baby Maree, Gabe wants to go with her. He does not want to stay in the room with the counselor. However, he stays without argument.
After the appointment we stop at the store. Gabe just wants to go home. He whines about shopping for groceries. Soon we are on our way home. Honestly, shopping is so much easier without him. He hangs on the cart in such a way that it is hard to steer or go around to the next aisle without running him over. He whines when I ask him to let go. I am trying to teach him to walk a few steps behind me. This is hard for him. He has such a 'me first' attitude that he always want to be out in front leading, even if he doesn't know where we are going.
At home he is calm until supper time. Then it starts all over.
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